Halloween.. loooong weekend!

here it's national holidays on tuesday... so we're all on holidays on monday too...
In italian is called "fare il ponte" sth like "bridging"

I really need it! I've never enough of holydays... we're going to pisa, no special plans, only my nephew's second birthday, maybe seeing some friends and a nice walk in the countryside. I want to collect leaves and pine-nuts to use as Xmas decorations.

Hope to get some good pictures to decorate my walls with!!!

As for Halloween.. there's not much tradition here, so I don't think I'll do anything.. but we have a typical food for this period of the year which I love... tiny almond sweets, all in different shapes and marron glace-- iced chesnuts.. yummmy!!!

Have a nice we to everybody!

Means of transport

This is the tram I take to go back home... isn't it what you expected from fashion-guru Milan?
Do you see me with my Prada 10 cm stiletto shoes getting on and off (not that I wear it too often, though!) without killing myself?

But I like it in some way.. it's vintage!

Prayer for a friend

One of my blogging friends is going through sth reguarding her health today.
She has a wonderful family and I think a happy life. I really wish everything goes well for her so that she can quickly return to it. I'm waiting for her next post. My prayers go to her today.

Spelling

I realize my english writing is really worse that it used to be.
I know I could use world spelling--- but I'm too lazy --- so please forgive my horrible mistakes ;)

Path in the wood

At many and different times in my life I have experience the feeling of being trapped.

In my small hometown.. in a dead relationship... in a job I didn't study for... in a family situation I cannot understand.. in a friendship that gives me nothing back anymore... in a flat where I don't feel at home... in a depressing rainy day...

When that happens I wished I could run away.. take a path into the woods... leave the noise behind, hear no voice but my own thoughts.. go up the hills and get lost in the embrace of nature.

I took this picture almost 3 years ago. My husband (just a boyfriend at that time ;) had chosen to leave Italy and take a job in Mexico.

I was utterly hurt.. our relationship was still fresh, we needed to be together to see if it could grow to sth more.. I had already experienced the emptiness and fakedom that long-distance can create. I thought we were doing so well, we were happier that I'd never been that I felt betrayed.

He said we had to be strong, that his career needed this move and that I should be understanding. That if it was true love I had nothing to fear. He would call and write and try to come back every two months.

When he left, I felt trapped. Again. Waiting for his calls, for his letters and emails. Waiting for him to decide wether to come that weekend or another.. Pretending nothing had changed..I was so angry on the first days.

I didn't have a car at that time, so one day that I had stayd at home all day waiting for his phonecall that had not arrived, was so mad I rented one and drove towards the Alps.

I remember driving nervously, and when I reached a narrow winding road I drove up, then parked the car and walked.

At first, fast and breathing heavily and looking at my feet.. than slower and slower, calming down.. the autumn color produced their healing effect on me... I went on enjoying my walking, taking some pictures, getting back in control of my mood, my thoughts.

I thought that I did need him. I couldn't go through being without him. I loved him. If this job was so important to him, I agree I could not ask him to leave it. I could go there with hime. Asked for a year off. Simple. That was the solution.

I got back home. The following morning he phoned me. His voice was broke. He said he had been so stupid, selfish and tactless... he didn't know that he would have miss me, our life, so much. He was so sorry for hurting me. He was now able to see we had to be together. He had just asked his boss to come back.

And so he did.

And a few weeks later I took him to walk in this wonderful piece of wood. We had a great time. I took a few picture as a memory. Now this mexican experience has become a laugh, an old joke...

People I come across...

Yesterday I walked back home. It's about 30 minutes, but I had to consume the huge cake I had eaten in the morning (see previous post) so was happy to do it.

I like walking anyway, it’s a slower way to get in touch with the surrounding world of the City, observing the people I come across, smelling the coffee aromas or freshly baked bread perfume.

On my way I think I met a sample of various humanoids…
- young woman in her 30s elegantly dressed in Burberry style talking on her own and trying to hide it pulling up her scarf.. but you still could notice the movements of her mouth .. maybe she feels like noone listens to her...
- middle-aged fat man in a tracksuit eating huge ice-cream and walking slowly - probably sent by his wife to do some jogging and loose some weight but cheating ;)
- teenage lovers: cuddling, french-kissing for 10 minutes - they blocked my way at a traffic light but couldn't help smiling - young, naive.. he'll probably dump her in a few weeks and break her hearts and she'll always confront her future boyfriend to his first love :( or maybe they'll grow up together closer and closer and start a wonderful family, who knows..
- a couple of old totally black dressed nuns carrying some Gucci shopping bags-- I didn't manage to glance what was inside but thought it was a funny contrast!
- an old elegant couple, both wearing an expensive looking mink fur (I assure you it’s not so cold!!!) arguing about their young cleaner - "you’re always there watching her tits" "no, I’m worried she breaks sth!" "I don’t believe you, I’ll fire her.." - poor old man, not even beeing allowed to look!
- a bunch of girls in their early 20s, wearing low-waist denims, their flat tummy exposed, colorful jackets, laughing and chatting, probably shopping for a university party (envy!!)
- a few really serious and stressed looking business man, with their anonymous gray suit, white shirt and dark tie, a bunch of newspapers in one hand, talking on the phone, hurrying and pushing me out of their way.. I’m quite familiar with this kind of people.. work with them…
- a young girl, with a beautiful smile… she made me feel happy too :D

How to treat yourself in a foggy day

Work is worse than ever.

I am frustrated, disappointed, angry and sad.

This morning I really didn't feel like waking up.

When I was a kind and couldn't sleep because I was sad or worried, my Mum used to tell me to concentrate on small pleasures.. like a shop-window full of dolls and colorful little dresses, or the ice-cream van that used to run in our neighborhood...


So, still in bed, I visualized the patisserie in front of my house. That gave me the strength to wake up.


So I took my time.

I had a huge, creamy cappuccino and a slice of a delicious chocolate cheesecake decorated with pine-nuts and strawberry.

I ate comfortably sitting on my own, reading a few chapters of my book (a romantic comedy in Bridget Jones' style) and chatting for a while with the nice girl that works there.

I enlightened a bit my foggy day.

My home town - random pictures

This is my home town.

When I was 16 I felt trapped there.
Small town, everybody knew me or knew somebody that knew me or my parents or my family or a friend of my family.

The Piazza the miracoli always packed with annoying tourists, tacky shops and expensive bad restautants. The old-style shops. A few students bar. The same pizza places. 2 icecream shops. No clubs. The only culture available was the classics in the theatre or at university. Few other cultural events. Sporadic exibitions. Rare rock concerts.
Few things to explore. Ten minutes by bikes.. and the city was finished. The countryside began. Emptyness.

I was hungry for discovering. Opening up to different people, cultures, habits.
I crave for a Big City. Millions of people to get lost among, flashing lights and skyscrapers, a vortix of shop-windows and restaurant signs, musics and .

I travelled a bit. Lived in some Big Cities.

I came back. I come back often now to visit my dad and friends.

The place has changed a lot - it has become really active, multicultural, "cool" - weird in such a short time..

I have changed too - I have satisfied part of my hunger. I do appreciate more now a slow pace, silent, relaxed country colours, small distances, fresh air and provincial comfort.

I wish I could live there now.

They got me!!!

It seems like here in the office someone has blocked all my accessess to my blog, uploading pictures... It says "blocked" or "restricted".

I could log here now only after having been trying for 6 hours... and I can't upload any picture... AAAAARGHHHHHHHH!!!

I really need to buy a pc and do my own stuff at home ... But I'm totally broke!!
I HATE HAVING A MORTGAGE!!!!!!

And I still have to buy:

- 4 -6 chairs for the dining room: I can't keep on inviting my friends to "bring your own chair" dinner
- curtains: I don't want my neighbours watching me while dancing on my own while listening to Jamiroquay.. I do it often these days ;))
- a few lamps or I'll break my big toe against the new laundry basket in the bedroom I never see
- some kind of piece of forniture for my shoes.. I have so many that the wardrobe is just full, I can't keep the under the bed as I do now because I have to spend 30 minutes every morning looking for them!
- sex and the city and Friens DVDs: it's a modern household must ;)!

Just an ordinary day

Nothing new today - Had yogurt and cereals for breakfast.

Spent 20 minutes looking for sth to wear and ended up with my usual black suite with an old Custo-like tshirt and my new Autum Camper shoes (they have a dark green leaf on it!)

Took the tube to work - Worked for a few hours.

Had Burger king for lunch to please my two junior collegues (who are both turning 24 this week and make me feel like the old sister).

Spent about 3 hours on the Internet - No sign for Gorgeous Boss - Going home now.
Maybe to the gym. Maybe not.

Just an ordinary day.

I'm so lucky

On monday night he cooked me the most delicious dinner.. He hates cooking and can't do it but spent 10 hours in the kitchen while I was at work.

He bought my favourite food (smoked salmon, foie gras, pecorino cheese..), my favourite flowers (tulips) a huge fruit cake and a small deli chocolate one.

He set up the table like in a design restaurant.

He opened a chilled sweet white wine.

He lit many candles.

He put on my favourite romantic music (quite embarassing to admit, but it's a CD of Dawson's Creek soundtrack).

He gave me a very thoughtful present.

We ate.

We drank.

We danced slowly in the sitting-room.

It was happiness.
































The day we got married it rained so much. Here they say sth like "Wet bride, lucky one".
well, I think I am and do not regret any drop.

Anniversary

Today is my first wedding anniversary.

Normally I'm not too much into this kind of celebration (like valentine's day - I find it too commercial) but I admit that today I really feel like spending some real time with Ricard.

He took a day off so he's in Milan now, and at this moment he's at home preparing a surprise dinner.. I'm really excited-- so I'm off too!

It's Friday

So another long and difficult week is over, Ricard is coming back (well, he just phoned to say that the check-in counters in Rome airport have some problems so there is a loooong que and most flights are delayed..)..

We don't have many plans, go and see some friends in the countryside on sunday and that's it..
We'll improvise!

Have a nice we to everybody!!

Poor Eve..

I was browsing my fav Brad Pitt fan club and ran into an article by a apparently well-known american artist (you'll tell me if it's true, as here have never heard of him!) who pictured Brad and Angelina as Adam and Eve.

Well, I have quite an adoration for the guy but....
WHY ARE THEY ALWAYS FRICKING BLAMING THE WOMAN WHEN A MAN??????
Has he been forced with violence? Has been tortured to death? Has been kidnapped?? Has been raped by her?? It doesn't seem so!

So, we're quite fed up with this old, conventional point of view that the woman is always the bad seducer and the man is the poor, naive, soft cheese??

Office life and crudelty

... I was in a 10-minutes meeting with GB, walked back in my office, my collegues all had already left to go to eat, no sign to say "hey, we're here, reach us!".

It confirms the latest trend... They treat me like I'm the cause of everyone's job problem but noone really dared to speak frankly or confront me. It's just this "avoiding", whispering at my back...
I agree here things are quite complicate.
But it really has nothing to do with me. I came here with the most positive attitude, willing to help and improve processes so that we could all work better and less.

I obviously wanted to learn more and do something I liked, but never been competitive at all.
But... maybe being an "external", maybe because they offered me a slightly higher salary , maybe because I'm a bit younger.. well I don't know why and honestly I do not care..
It's so much easier to blame someone than analyze what is the real problem..

This is the usual story of mutual misunderstanding.. I only think that is a shame because actually we all end up unhappy (as they do not resolve any problem in taking it out on me).

I am utterly disappointed by this working experience. But I know what I am worth of, I'm not afraid of change so I will go on with my carreer and my life ...maybe looking for another job or maybe stay here and do my best anyway.

And I'm going for some lovely pizza on my own now!

I love my digital camera...

I can take all silly pictures I like... (again pictures from spanish holidays)
this was called "still nature with a fork and a salami-skin" - quite a laugh with my friends


Craft shop in Andalusia



Selfportrait in the mirror



My best friend Tanias's eye and some beautiful maiolica in a Tapas restaurant



Still nature part II - spanish onion and tomato (taken from Tania's boyfriend who got obsessed with my camera and took about 20 pictures of his food!)



Vino Tinto - a refreshing typical andalusian drink, chilled red wine with sparkly lemon water



Beautiful maiolica - detail (I got obssed with them!!)



Carved ancient stone - detail



Restaurant sign - I love this pictue, you can see a ray of light...

No-spending sunday

I was writing a long post about my good relaxing we.. but GB (gorgeous boss ;)) came and in the attempt of hiding it I deleted it... :(
Well, in resumen, It was good but short!

With one note.... on sunday it was pouring down rain, very cold rain, an early beginning of winter.

It was just the perfect day to remain lazily cuddling in bed, we watched "Great Lebowsky" (it's one of Ricard's favourite, he loves Turturro playing the latin-american bowling player!), finished the tons of food and chocholate sweets left over from the previous-night dinner-for 6 I had cooked, a got out just to go to our local gym and do some more relax in the sauna and hammam....

Before going to bed, we suddenly realized it was probably the first day in years we hadn't spent any money!!! (newspapers wew on strike here...)! and I didn't feel any worse ;))